cactus i.v.

By DA SOUTHERN
dasouthern(at)gmail.com
We have finally arrived at that special time of the year! That spectacle we die-hard TV fanatics like to call “The Season”. For those of us who crave what can only be satisfied with the promise that this will be the best year ever on TV, this is our moment.
We, here at the […]

By MICHELLE RICCARDI
mia8263(at)gmail.com
Rachael Ray finally called and asked me to be on her show.
Just kidding, but I did get tickets to her show. I am no pro in getting tickets for shows or concerts or sporting events because people always get them for me. I read the directions to the show about 15 times and […]

By DIZZ TATE
dizztate(at)hotmail.com
Before we get started, let’s talk about all the television that played this week… because television affects fashion a lot… and I want to talk about my favorite shows!
Monday I watched How I Met Your Mother, the season premiere, which was okay, but didn’t quite live up to the last season. But I […]

By SUSAN LULGJURAJ
yanxchick(at)gmail.com
ATLANTIC CITY, N.J. – Chad Brown is a failure.
Don’t think so?
Look at his win record. Sure, the actor — not the football player — turned poker professional has won millions of dollars playing poker and visits some of the most beautiful (and not so nice) places in the world. But in the end, […]

By BEN SZMANDA
Gore Vidal has always been a political oddity. Post Reagan revolution, though — now that the NAFTA signing, welfare “reforming” Bill Clinton is the face of liberalism — he can seem downright confounding. Especially when it comes to his historical writing.
People don’t expect to read that someone known for radical (as well as […]

By ROXY RETAIL
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
I walked into work one day two weeks ago when my coworker Sarah looked like a ghost.
“You okay?” I asked.
“Uh, Roxy, do you need to borrow some shoes?” she asked.
My feet weren’t freezing, so I knew I had put something on my toes that morning. Plus, Sarah’s a size 10, so, even if […]

By MICHELLE L.
satine81(at)aol.com

of five
Across the Universe (2007) is set against the backdrop of the ’60s. It is essentially a love story between Lucy (Evan Rachel Wood of Thirteen and Down in the Valley) and Jude (Jim Sturgess of Mouth to Mouth and Crossing Over), two teenagers who meet each other in a time when […]

By KERI WILLIS
kerilwillis(at)yahoo.com
[[Ed.’s note: Keri is stepping in for Jim Montana to hold down the Politics column this week. Look for Jim to be back at the helm next week — while Keri is in school, educating our future leaders.]]
I’ve never really considered myself to be much of a political nut or a history buff. […]

By LANIE PIMENTEL
petunia5043(at)gmail.com
Ergonomics in the office.
“What?” One might ask. So I shall repeat. Ergonomics. According to Ergonomics.org, the term is derived from two Greek words: “ergon,” meaning work and “nomoi,” meaning natural laws. Ergonomists study human capabilities in relationship to work demands. In other words, it is the study […]

By MELODY
MyMelody4U(at)gmail.com
I wanted to take this week and interview a man about relationships. I selected a friend of mine that has been with his girlfriend for about eight months. He is 29 and very outspoken. I figured he would give it to me straight and not sugarcoat anything.
I know not all men will answer the […]

By JAMES “TATTOO” CHAPRACKI
geocities.com/tattoospinstriping
This one is really special to James and Lisa.

By TY FREER
ty_freer(at)yahoo.com
This article is kind of long, so I won’t bother with a witty, elaborate intro. The following are my team rankings for the NFL after three weeks:
32. Atlanta Falcons (0-3) – Which is worse for the city? A) Vick is going to jail, B) Vick’s former backup is now […]

I watched him wipe his tears, and I couldn’t help but smile.
That sounds like the opening sentence for a vindictive romance novel, but it’s just the opposite, really.
Recently, my friend was the groom in a wedding, and I watched him more than the bride because, to be honest, I had never met the bride before […]

By LISA SOKOLOWSKI
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
I missed my brush with greatness. Well, greatness by association.
Max Bernstein, the son of Nora Ephron (who wrote When Harry Met Sally and Sleepless in Seattle) and Carl Bernstein (the man who co-broke Watergate and was played by Robert Redford in All the President’s Men), was supposed to be in my town with […]

By MICHELLE RICCARDI
mia8263(at)gmail.com
It amazes me how busy the restaurant Chili’s is near me. The food isn’t that good. I think it is more convenient than anything else. I worked at the busy location near me for about two weeks and decided the patience you need to be any part of that staff is way beyond […]

By DIZZ TATE
dizztate(at)hotmail.com
Hey everybody! Long time, no see. As my wonderful Frenchie friends would say, I am tres tres tres desolee.
{It means I’m sorry, sillies, go get some cultural knowledge!}
Now then, to the topic of importance: FASHION. We love it, we hate it, we just can’t live without it. This week, we’ve got some good […]

Dear Niki -
My friend asked me to borrow a lot of money. I have the money to lend her, and she knows it. I know she needs help, but I’m scared it will ruin our friendship if she doesn’t pay me back. Friendship is more important than money, and I don’t want to look like […]

By BEN SZMANDA
In 1937, the Dominican strongman Generalissimo Trujillo ordered the execution of every Haitian within the borderland of the Dominican Republic and Haiti. Soldiers and civilians attacked migrants with machetes, and, within five days, as many as 35,000 people were murdered. Apparently, “the Parsley Massacre,” as it became known, was intended […]

By MICHELLE L.
satine81(at)aol.com

of five
In 2001, an investigation by the FBI was underway to find the identity of a possible mole within its organization. For over ten years, the bureau had been investigating suspicious leaks that, among other things, had caused the execution of two Soviet officials who had been secretly working for the FBI. […]

By ROXY RETAIL
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
I will, one day, have enough money to shop at Urban Outfitters without guilt.
For now, I study the catalog like it’s my SAT prep book — and replicate the styles at Kohl’s. Maybe that’s not fashion conscious, but it’s money conscious.
There’s a line in a Cute is What We Aim For’s There’s A […]

By LANIE PIMENTEL
petunia5045(at)gmail.com
I am a loyal employee. It is just a part of who I am. I like to end my job signed, sealed and delivered. Clean up all loose ends. Poke a fork in it, it’s done.
This usually isn’t a problem. I only left a handful of full time […]

By JIM MONTANA
jim.montana(at)hotmail.com
Last week some of you expressed that you knew I hated George Bush, and you were tired of hearing it. I only have one question for those people: Are you just as tired of hearing about our troops being killed on a daily basis?
So in honor of those people out there, I will […]

This just went live on online-writing-jobs.com. I figured I’d share it with all of you as well.
Are you excited about the new fall television season? Do you want an excuse to spend time in front of the set? Well, then I have a job for you.
cactus i.v. needs a television columnist. From January to May, […]

By MELODY
MyMelody4U(at)gmail.com
Now that the colder months are approaching, the adult league softball season has, for the most part, come to an end. Last Saturday night, my boyfriend and I were at home playing chess and relaxing. {[I know not a popular way to spend a Saturday night, but given our hectic schedules finding a night […]

By JAMES “TATTOO” CHAPRACKI
geocities.com/tattoospinstriping

By TY FREER
ty_freer(at)yahoo.com
The past week has been so crazy, I don’t know where to start. Between the cheatin’ Pats, OJ and James Spader beating James Gandolfini for Best Actor, it seems the world has been walking the fine line between “quirky” and “weird as s***.” It makes me just want to sit down […]

“Good thing you like talking,” James said to me as we were sitting in his house in front of his new wood burning stove. He was putting some kindling into a box with old newspapers and cardboard, and I was watching.
“Thanks,” I said, dryly, turning my attention to the open front door.
Up the steps walked […]

By LISA SOKOLOWSKI
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
I would be great if Name That Tune was still on the air. Give me a simple description, and I can name that tune in zero notes, Jim.
Point in case: Jordan [[ex-s&r, as I think she will be forever called]] imed me. “I need your help,” she wrote. She was looking for a […]

By MICHELLE RICCARDI
mia8263(at)gmail.com
In middle school, my class took a trip to Medieval Times, which is a restaurant with a show. The idea of the restaurant is to be fun and different. There aren’t any utensils, so eating with your hands is different — but I don’t recall it being fun, for me at least. […]

By SOOZ
Yanxchick(at)gmail.com
Bluffing is just another term for lying. Although, when it comes to poker, lying, I mean, bluffing is accepted.
But there is an art to being a good bluffer. Just because you don’t twitch or hold an Oreo above your ear every time you are bluffing doesn’t mean people can’t notice it. You have to […]

By BEN SZMANDA
The guy who coined the term cyberspace has removed himself from the sci fi genre for a while. William Gibson says his past two novels have been set in the present, rather than the future, because he’s still trying to puzzle the present out. It’s funny to say it about such […]

Dear Niki,
I have a friend that I’ve known for many years, and he’s a compulsive liar. Everything he says are lies. I really think he has a problem. Should I confront him or just not pay any mind like I’ve been doing?
Pinocchio’s Friend
Dear Jiminy Cricket,
I can understand your dilemma here, but […]

By TYLER DURDEN’S STALKER
cactusiv(at)gmail.com[[Ed.’s note: I’ve been trying all day to figure out how to post the video from YouTube. Apparently WordPress disallow what they call “arbitrary code.” When I figure it out, I’ll get it up there. For now, check it out here: http://youtube.com/watch?v=XpiwhkK1ZXs]]

Britney Spears didn’t sing. She didn’t dance. She didn’t do anything.
What […]

By ROXY RETAIL
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
A few weeks back, I got a request to write about high heels. I thought about it for a while, but, really, I didn’t have too much to say about them.
My gripe with high heels stems from girls and women who don’t know how to walk in them. They either keep super stiff […]

By MICHELLE L.
satine81(at)aol.com

of five
The story starts with Nicholas Angel (Simon Pegg of Shaun of the Dead and Grindhouse) training to become a police officer. He is dedicated, obsessed and focused on becoming the best police officer on the force. When he is stationed in London, however, he is so good that he puts […]

By LANIE PIMENTEL
petunia5045(at)gmail.com
I feel as though September is a time of rebirth when it comes to work. It is a time to get back in touch with one’s profession. A time to re-focus on things that may have gotten lost in the shuffle of summer time. During the summer, work can feel like […]

By JIM MONTANA
jim.montana(at)hotmail.com
Last week I promised to talk in more detail about the GOP debate that took place last Thursday night on Fox Snooze. However, this past Tuesday our country observed the sixth anniversary of the attacks of September 11.
That got me thinking. Are we really any better off six years later than we were […]

By MELODY
MyMelody4U(at)gmail.com
The other day, I told my boyfriend that if I could chose, this time in American history would not be the one I would prefer to have lived during. It seems like yesterday that the horrible events of 911 shattered so many lives and shocked the nation.
My parents can recall where they were when […]

By JAMES “TATTOO” CHAPRACKI
geocities.com/tattoospinstriping

By TY FREER
ty_freer(at)yahoo.com
Writing for the cactus puts me in an awkward scheduling predicament; my articles are due by noon on Monday and run on Tuesday. Thus, because of said deadlines, I will never have the chance to do any post-game analysis on Monday Night Football games (unless I decide to write about a game […]

I try to be a good person.
When I was in college, it seemed like I did more volunteer work than the rest of the school combined. I was always sitting in the hallway, raising money for a cause, and while classes were in session and no one was walking the straightaways, I was jotting down […]

By LISA SOKOLOWSKI
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
AARP — yes, the group for seniors — named Chandler, Ariz. one of five great places to live in its latest issue.
It sounds good for the baby boomers who are nearing in on retirement age — not a rock band like Neba, which happens to call Chandler home. At least, the band’s PureVolume […]

By SOOZ
yanxchick(at)gmail.com
One of the toughest things to do in poker is switch from playing tournament poker to cash-game poker. Some people don’t think there is a difference in the two because poker is just poker, right?
But it’s not. If you watch the famous poker players, you’ll notice a difference in their tournament game to their […]

By BEN SZMANDA
It’s no secret that mass media can spawn a strange religious devotion. We are constantly being fed images of people as manufactured objects of desire. We even call them by their rightful names: Icons. So it’s not surprising that some folks invest way too much energy in them, or that these icons can […]

By TYLER DURDEN’S STALKER
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
Outcasts, dorks, nerds (whatever you want to call yourselves), don’t give up. Life gets better as you get older.
When you graduate high school, where you made of by the high school quarterback and you thought your frizzy hair would never calm down, life is so much better. Just look Justin Long, who […]

By MICHELLE L.
satine81(at)aol.com
Blades of Glory (2007): 4 out of 5 stars
I may have said this before in reference to Will Ferrell movies: They are hit or a miss with me. I either hate them hardcore (Talladega Nights) or it ends up being one of my favorite movies (Stranger Than Fiction). Now, which is Blades of […]

By ROXY RETAIL
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
I wanted a neon green shirt.
I was 16, and had my heart set on it.
My friends laughed the first time I wore it. We were going to a local college fair, and my friends said if they wanted to lose me, they’d just hide from the neon beam.
Funny. Really funny.
But, the thing is: […]

By LANIE PIMENTEL
petunia5045(at)gmail.com
Happy Thursday to all the working and non-working folk…I think that covers just about everyone. When I start these articles, I’m never quite sure where they were going end. Last week, I had no idea I had a two part-er on my hands, but alas, the ideas and thoughts (brace yourself) kept flowing!
When […]

By JIM MONTANA
jim.montana(at)hotmail.comWell the Republicans are at it again. I’m talking about the latest scandal involving Sen. Larry Craig of Idaho, the guy one that got caught in the sex sting in the airport bathroom.
He announced Saturday that he was resigning, then, only two days later to say that he was having second thoughts about […]

By MELODY
MyMelody4U(at)gmail.com
Recently, as you may have read in my last article, I have been forced into cohabitation with my boyfriend. This is something I have done in past relationships with obvious failure as I have a new boyfriend. Living with a significant other is an art I have yet to master and is an idea […]

By JAMES “TATTOO” CHAPRACKI
geocities.com/tattoospinstriping
This ended up on the back of a guitar. Talk about a sweet six string.

By Ty Freer
ty_freer(at)yahoo.com
Like everyone else in the country, I chose to get away on Labor Day weekend. And like everyone else in the country, I chose to make the gorgeous, exciting and construction-free paradise of Milwaukee my weekend destination (if that didn’t make you laugh then you either a) are from Milwaukee or b) have […]

I wish I was old enough to have seen CBGB at its heyday. Patti Smith, the Ramones, Television. All these bands tip a hat to the most famous rock club ever.Hilly Kristal, the club’s owner, called it CBGB for a reason: He wanted a club for bluegrass. That’s what the name stands for, you know. […]

By LISA SOKOLOWSKI
cactusiv(at)gmail.com
I was planning on starting this off by saying the Manic Street Preachers sound English right from the very note of Send Away The Tigers. The band allows its vocalist — James Dean Bradfield — to sing harmonies and soar in a way that American bands don’t do. American bands are much more […]

By DIZZ TATE
dizztate(at)hotmail.com
Has anyone else noticed how many fantasy movies are out lately?!! It’s so strange, how you don’t really have a true fantasy movie apart from Harry Potter for about three years, and then suddenly, “WHAM!” there are dozens. I have expressed my opinion before that the film does incidentally affect the street fashion […]

Rabbit rabbit.
My brother Joe and I were watching television once, and we heard that the first thing you say on the first of any month is “Rabbit rabbit,” you will have good luck for the whole month.
Maybe that’s just superstition, but I’ve tried to do it every month since [[and, honestly, that’s about 15 years […]

By BEN SZMANDA
According to one reviewer on Amazon.com, Mark Richard used to run his writing workshop something like a religious revival. I believe it: That kind of rapturous energy is evident in his writing, and it’s is one of the reasons why his book of short stories, “Charity,” has been a longtime favorite of mine.
The […]

By SOOZ
yanxchick(at)gmail.com
That’s been the feeling lately. I’ve been getting snapped off.
Have you ever gone through a streak so bad, you wonder how you ever liked playing poker? Yet, you’re determined to get back to the table.
I’m not going to tell everyone about my “bad beat” stories. I hate them. I really do. People lose to […]